And The Journey Continues

Well, this past Wednesday was supposed to be my last court date. My lawyer assured me that if I got my license back before we went before the judge that the judge would more than likely dismiss my case. Well, that did not happen. He continued my case until March 16th and will consider dismissing my case pending I complete 20 hours of community service. I walked out of the court room extremely upset and very defeated. It really isn't the hours of community service (well, it is a little but I'll go into why in a minute) it is the fact that it was never mentioned to me as an option. I am a planner. I want to know all the possible outcomes. I just wish my lawyer would have let me know that it was a possibility. She didn't even act surprised. She said, "Man. That's a bummer." Really?

There is only one other thing that bothers me a little. I have done 2 weeks of inpatient rehab, 60 hours of group counseling, and attended 4 AA meetings. That is a lot of stuff. In the eyes of the court, what is the purpose and how will doing 20 hours of community service help me "recover"?

I love to serve. So, the act of the community service is exciting to me. However, it is the humilation that comes along with the reason that I am doing the community service that I have to deal with. I know I shouldn't feel this way but, for now, I do. I am praying that God will take this feeling away from me before I start or at least after the first time.

On Wedneday when we got back home, I sat down to do my quiet time. I had missed my quiet time the day before. One of the chapters I read was Romans 12. Romans 12:12 says "rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, and be constant in prayer". God is so good. He knew that I need to hear that. I just meditated on that verse for the rest of the day and the next. I am more at peace about continuing this journey.

Now, I just have to get my community service set up. I am really praying (and would love for you to) that they allow me to choose where I serve. Tori Young (most of you know her) is head of junior volunteers at Duke Hospital. She said she would be more than happy to set me up with something. This would totally take care of the humiliation issue. We will see. I will keep you updated.

Also, please pray for wherever I serve. I pray that I will be able to build relationships with people and show them the love of Christ. I pray that God will recieve all the glory from all of this.